What might have been

here I am, in the shower
i've been here, for an hour
remembering, us back then
pondering, what might have been.
i close my eyes, i see you smile
shadows of happiness, it's been awhile
for it left, I don't know when
and so i wonder, what might have been.

the waters cold, i start to shake
i ask myself, was it a mistake
allowing it, all to end
questioning, what might have been.
i lower my head, i believe i'm crying
the "i'm fine" stance, i'm no longer buying
now i feel, the tears descend
longing for, what might have been.

the waters off, yet still i stand
lost in thought, in a distant land
i want you back, where to begin
no more thinking, what might have been.
instead i should call, say i love you still
sadly i won't, no i never will
for that courage, i cannot find within
and so i'll wonder, what might have been.

other showers, have come and gone
none of which, had last as long
so i grab, paper and pen
and try to voice, what may have been.
feelings explored, for me to consider
and maybe an email, that i may never deliver
just this poem, would be all i would send
telling of that shower, and what might have been.